Although bursts of emotions have preceded University I don't feel particularly momentous or sentimental. Moving in didn't feel profound; it just happened. Experience has not been sullied by expectation but I feel the build up to this amazing thing has been an occasion in itself. Urgh that sounds disgustingly try-hard-philosophyish. Apologies.
Meeting new people is pretty wonderful. We must savour the awkwardness for soon it shall pass and we will know each other far too well. The social need to be extrovert and exhibitionist to fill the holes of not knowing anyone is tiring. Having a solitary, not-lonely moment in room (Although am very glad of art from home and John Green books to keep me company). The clothes on floor feel like me. The scratchy dust cover on bed does not.* Wagon Wheel on repeat is comforting. Not by weeping, but in a slightly unfamiliar disconcerting way, do I feel homesick.** It doesn't sound like home.*** But I type that and look at the photo of my Grandparents and any frown is flipped. It was time to go and it is good.
Dad wrote me to "Go Well" in my University adventures. Deserve Success. Do hard things. Looking for Alaska**** starts of with the seeking of something radically other: "'I go to seek a Great Perhaps.' That's why I'm going. So I don't have to wait until I die to start seeking a Great Perhaps." The Great Perhaps is upon me. Time to fulfil a wanderlust with learning, new friends and frolicking.
|My room is HUGE. Instead of the Cupboard Under the Stairs I found Narnia when I opened the door.|
*Mother Dearest, could I please be sent my duvet and tri-pillow with the next car coming my way? And A3 paper, green wool coat and the small brown bag with long strap? It is hanging in the left side of my wardrobe. Thank you very much.
**This song is the sole reason for pleasing English marks. Bluegrass calms a girl down.
***Dave, I miss your singing.
****I am unironically enthusiastic about John Green's authorship.